Don’t Let This Raggedy Country Stress You Out (A Self-Care Guide to the Election)

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I won’t even pretend this is a politically neutral space.

I’m a progressive who wants this country to abolish its systems of white supremacy. Point. Blank. Period. I know that’s going to take more than one election and will probably be the fight for the rest of my life. 

The fight, unfortunately, will continue no matter who is elected. That’s why self-care is so important because we must gear up for the long haul. As my friend Preston pondered a few days ago, “How. Did. Our. Ancestors. Do. This?” As best as I can see, we do our best to fight at full strength and then we take turns tapping out because the battle is unsustainable for one person to carry it alone.

Still, I won’t say that I’m not anxious about this upcoming U.S. election. I’m a little hopeful but I’m also realistic. Whatever the outcome, I’ve been doing some deep work over the past few weeks to get ready for it. 

What I want YOU to do is to prepare for this the best way you can. The next three days are gonna be heavy so let’s see what we can do to lighten the load:

Pre-Election Day

First, let’s take a deep breath. These past four years have been incredibly tense and undeniably demanding. Add in the layer of stress that is 2020 and there is no doubt in my mind that we are ready for some relief. 

So let’s talk comfort. 

What can you set up pre-November 3 to help you get through the next week + change? A few thoughts: 

  • Prep/plan your meals. What’s something simple yet nourishing and comforting? (I will be making a big ass pot of seafood gumbo.) Make sure you have enough food, paper products, etc, to avoid making last-minute trips to the store. Make a plan to hydrate. 

  • Consider your media consumption. Will you watch TV or be on social? How much information will you take in? Do you need to delete apps? If you work online, what content can you schedule to minimize your time online over the next few days? 

  • Inform your people of your plans. The last thing *I* want over the next few days is a bunch of folks texting me, giving me the play-by-play of what’s happening in the news. If that’s you too, make a quick announcement: “Hey y’all — I’m going dark til Thursday. Taking care of me and minimizing my media intake. See y’all on the other side.” Or on the flipside, if you feel like you need to hold hands with someone through everything, reach out to see if you can do a Wednesday morning check-in to talk through everything.


Election Day

If you’re fortunate enough to work from home, you have access to the comforts to help you get through the day. If you work with the general public or outside the home, you’ll need a different set of tools. 

  • Give yourself something to look forward to. Plan your evening. As soon as you get home, you’ll have _____ waiting for you. Find your headphones. Get a good playlist going (I love Nap Ministry’s Lay Back/Relax mix). Have your Netflix list all queued up.  Let everyone else in your house know what the plan is going to be.

Post-Election

Regardless of the outcome, joy — black joy in particular — is imperative. It’s what has held my ancestors and yours together through the most difficult times of this nation’s history. Even in the moments where ain’t shit funny and when you’ve got to dig deeper than you ever have to find something worth smiling about. 

Here’s a few things to do November 4 and beyond: 

  • Journal what you’re feeling. Dig into your biggest dreams for yourself and your loved ones. One resource I’ve found incredibly helpful is Natasha Marin’s book, “Black Imagination.” In it, she asks a diverse group of Black folks to “describe or imagine a world where you are loved, safe, and valued.” Their answers, and her short meditations between chapters, will move you. 

  • Claim your space. Fortify yourself with the writings of those who have come before you and those who are blazing their trail now. To start: Audre Lorde, Toni Morrison, Octavia Butler, Jesmyn Ward, Kiese Laymon, Roxane Gay, Brittney Cooper, Damon Young. 

  • Support groups doing good work for the next generation. I’m a huge fan of Radical Monarchs, a social justice troop arming young girls with the tools they need to be fierce advocates. Find an organization to support and share their work far and wide. 

If you need extra support over the next few months, consider joining our Good Morning SuiteHeart project, which sends you a daily self-care text message of affirmation and action steps.

Tara Jefferson

Tara Jefferson is the founder of The Self Care Suite. 

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